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 When it comes to travelling solo, location matters.

I have spent time in two very different locations, Hawaii and Hong Kong. Hawaii sounds like it would be the easiest place to blend in - sun, beaches, English the dominant language - but it wasn't so simple. My solo status marked me out as a peculiar loner among the honeymoon, anniversary and once in a lifetime trippers. I felt like Miss Haversham from Great Expectations, who wandered around in her cobweb-laced wedding gown decades after being jilted at the alter. The wide circle of hotel guests kept their distance from me. And it wasn't just that they didn't speak to me, but they kept their eyes averted as though one look and they too would be struck solo.

Hong Kong however allowed me to blend in. Whether it was at the bird market, the flea stalls or the homeopathic markets with dried up creature anatomies on display, no one gave me a glance. Among the locals, tourists and expats I was just a fly on the wall. And for a people-watcher like me, it was perfect - I was happily unobserved. 

Only once in Hong Kong did I feel watched, but I had probably ventured where a lone woman shouldn't. I had taken the train north of Hong Kong, in the direction of the Chinese border to visit The Temple of 10,000 Buddhas. It was hard to find, and I mistakenly made a detour through a graveyard inhabited by aggressive monkeys fighting over food left by mourners. Eventually I found the temple hidden behind an Ikea and climbed the steep steps. The stone staircase was lined with life-size figures of Buddha, all different, all painted golden. It was raining, and I had an umbrella which blinkered my sideview, but I swear some of those statues moved when I passed. The monastery at the top seemed abandoned, but I felt watched and wished I'd left a note in my hotel room stating my plans for the day.

I should say that for technical purposes, I wasn't strictly solo on these trips. My husband was in meetings from early morning till late so, for much of my waking day, I was strictly solo.   

Miss Haversham heads to the beach
Who watches who?




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